Monday, January 08, 2007

same shit, different qualification

I promised myself I wouldn't pull any of that up all night, write two thousand words of garbage at the last minute shit now that I'm paying a grand a semester for the benefit of learning... but what could I do? I had a fever! I went to hospital again on saturday and wrote the fucker last night. I'm sick. Actually I'm really sick, because what made me churn the bloody essay out was actually Sonia saying she would take me to the pub on the corner if I finished it. The barman there looks exactly like Captain Haddock and is in love with Sonia. I really really want him to say 'Billions of blistering blue barnacles' but I'm too shy to ask. We met our friend who lives round the corner there and took him home to our spooky basement (we're not allowed down there but luckily our landlord is back in Romania) to drink babycham. He is twenty-six and has never been in a relationship. We were fascinated but he seemed slightly offfended when we asked if he was a virgin. I cycled to college this morning, first exercise in three weeks, and it's blown my mind. The essay makes just a little bit less sense than the above passage. A grand a semester works out at £12.82 per hour of class.


Anonymous said...

Espèce de bachi-bazouk!

woodscolt said...

Er, that was me. I don't know why it's anonymous. It's the damn switch to using gmail log-ins.

problemshelved said...

i knew it was you anyway